By Again, this morning I got up late. I did everything as quickly as possible and dropped my children at school just in time. It’s 8.30 am now. I am supposed to be in my college. I still have 20 min of travel and the traffic is really heavy. One more late punch today. It isn’t very pleasant doing it over and over again. I am asking my driver to drive the car as fast as he could. I am checking on my watch every now and then, becoming more and more anxious with each passing minute. All the way I am so worried and tensed. It is showing physical symptoms, I am getting headaches and palpitation. I rewind my morning. Children who didn’t wake up with one call, not getting ready at a faster pace, husband who never helped me with my morning chores. I am now feeling angry at them. So I am upset and angry and worried. Fear adds up. What am I going to say to HR? How will I explain my late punch? Rest of my travel about 45 minutes all that was on my mind was somehow reaching the college fast, full of tension and anxiety. I am full of guilt. I am blaming myself and everybody for turning in late today. That horrible traffic. Why are the roads this bad?
This state of mind is the punishment I give to myself every day for getting late. Over and over again, my health has started to fail. You all know anxiety affects your health- diabetes. hypertension and whatnot.
Am I not allowed to relax and enjoy that 45 min travel, even though I got late?
Will my worries and anxiety clear the traffic or turn the clock backward? Will I reach earlier because I am feeling bad? Will my car start to fly because of self-sabotage? It’s never going to happen. No use in all those devastating emotions.
If my emotions are not a solution, being upset, worried or anxious, why not choose to be happy instead? Am I saying it’s okay to be late? No. I am not going to make it on time. Now, let me at least take care of my health. I can very well relax and listen to music. This way I am not being hard on myself and save my energy on my productivity at work.
How can I deal with this? I can possibly wake up earlier the next day, I can explain to my family and get their support, or get ready to face the consequences of reporting late. I have one of these options. My emotions don’t really matter. So why not choose wisely?
Next time you are getting late or got held up in traffic, learn to relax a bit.
See you in my next sharing. Until then stay connected, my divine souls.