By I am realizing nowadays that many times in my life, I have wanted people to understand me, appreciate me and love me. I have sometimes requested my close circle to show their love to me. Sometimes I felt denial to show love. By love, I mean the affection that we expect from our parents, siblings, spouse, children, friends and so on.
In search of love from those who were around me, I started forgetting myself. Whenever I felt denial, I realised I had behaved like a rebel—a rebel in search of love and acceptance. I was begging for love.
Every time I go to temples, I see many people begging for money at the temple entrance. Why should people beg for money? Because they don’t have money in their hands and they don’t know what else to do to earn it.
If that person had money, do you think he is going to beg? They will not, right? No one wants to be a beggar.
This understanding made me realize that I was begging for love since I had no love for myself. I have not accepted the person I am. I have not filled my vessel with self-love, which is empty.
If only I was so filled in love with myself, I don’t know whether I would search and beg for it from others. From now on I am deciding not to beg for love because I have started loving myself.